Wow! LOSER!!! I have not had a minute to catch up on our blog! We spent our summer remodeling my grandma's house, going to summer dance class and playing our tushies off. At the end of July Nathaniel was laid off from CAT and it's been an interesting time with him being home and the lack of much needed funds. I took a job in August at a local grocery store and it's OK. It's not my dream job, but it's extra money that our family needed. Natalee is attending a new pre-school at our local Elementary school. Some days she loves it and others she doesn't. I guess that's just her being almost four. Emilee is being her sweet self. Potty training could be going better but our family has been through some changes as of late so I am attributing our potty training woe's with that.

This month we will be celebrating Natalee's fourth birthday. Her actual birthday is not until November 4Th, but I am trying to cash in on the good weather. We have a Tinkerbell party planned with the family at our home. I hate people coming to our house-I hate this place-but at least I have a home. I know I should be thankful for what God has given me, but sometimes it is so hard. I think I have developed some mild depression over the past few months. I feel myself withdrawing more from my friends than I have been before. I have a few AWESOME friends that I use to be close to. Amie-she is big hearted, sweet, funny and always would remind me to believe that God would see me through. I have lost touch with her and I miss her SO much. Jamie-the friend that I never thought would be my friend. Our lives are so parallel yet so different. Our girls are all the same age and our husbands are equally annoying. She makes me laugh OFTEN. She listens when I need her. We love to shop and talk and I feel like if I hug her she will hug me back. That's important in a friendship:) Lynn-the oldest friend I have. I love her and need her everyday. That's all I need to say about Lynn-LOVE YOU!

Oh, I forgot....We had the annual Jean Family Cook-Out on September 26Th. It was a pretty good turn out and the rain missed us. YAY! We were all able to sit around the fire an enjoy the company of family and friends. The kids ran than butts off and had SO much fun. I will post some pics soon:)

For anyone who follows this at all-I am so sorry for not updating more than I do.. Remember to call me out on it-EMAIL me and say NEW BLOG PLEASE:)

Be safe, Until next time....

The Jean Family

Nathaniel, Amanda

Natalee and Emilee

I'm sucha slacker!

Okay, it's been 1 month and 4 days since I posted last....Since then, my cousin Shannon came for a visit and that was so great. I remember when he was about 5 or six he told me in the back yard you was going to be a badeball player when he grew up. I asked him when he was here what ever happened to that dream...he said life happened. How true is that? Anyone else ever feel like all the dreams when we were kids have disappeared b/c life happened?
My nana celebrated her 67th birthday on the 17th. All she wanted was Papa John's Pizza and chocolate cake. I wish everyone else was so easy please. I'm just thankful I had anothe year with her. She's not sick-she's probably healthier than I am! I'm just so lucky to have her. I have been having some reproductive issues since Emilee was born-lack of menstration-and my gyn. diagnosed me with PCOS. Not that I'm looking to conceive, but when and if we decide to our best chances will be the first month I am off of my birth control. I'm happy with my babies that God gave me-I'm not willing to push my luck. If it happens, it happens. I want be "taking extreme measures".
And....Nathaniel and I celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary on May 7th. I had an appt that day and he bought groceries..later that night I was setting up for a yard sale...technically we have NOT celebrated...no card and he kinda forgot. I started seeing a holistic dr for weight management. I've gained 30 lbs since june 07 and I'm incredibly over weight right now. I needed other help. Hopefully, with Dr. Turner my life will change for the better and permanently.
Nathaniel also learned last week that his last day of employment will be July 31st. I'm terrifed. I so desperately want to find work just to take some of the stress off of him. Pray that God will lend me a push towards what I need to do for my family. More to come

Frustration, Irritation

OK, so I've been having trouble getting my pics to upload...so no new pics for a while. Anyway, Easter is this weekend and as usual I have myself spread as thin at Tori Spellings waistline. Friday I am hopefully going to pick up my cousin from the other side of the state. It's his birthday that day but I HOPEFULLY can talk him in to coming on that day. Saturday is Bunnyville and Church at 7pm. I am going on Saturday evening b/c Sunday would be almost impossible. I am spending most of the day on Sunday in Hoopeston with Nathaniel's family. He told me that if I give up spending Christmas with my family we could spend all day Easter with mine. Of course I am not going to give up Christmas with my family. We made a deal to spend Christmas Eve with his Family and Christmas day with mine. His family has a big to-do on Christmas Eve with all the presents, bells and whistles. So, it only makes since to spend all day Christmas Eve with them and give Christmas Day to mine. AHHHH!! Am I rambling yet?! Then he said that if I really don't want to go to Hoopeston on Sunday I could spend Easter with my family but he was taking the girls to Hoopeston. Which means I wouldn't be with my girls on Easter. Has it occurred to anyone else that he was threatening me? I'd like to see him try and spend an ENTIRE day with the girls. I will not let that happen. He was pulling at my heart strings. He knows damn well that I would obviously be miserable ALL day in Hoopeston than spend a holiday away from my girls. The only thing that ticks me off about going to Hoopeston this weekend is the time difference-we're eating at 1pm IL time so that means 2pm IN time. That is right in the middle of the day. So I have Easter morning at home with the girls then off to Hoopeston by noon-no time with my family. I'm tired of all the crap anymore. I don't want to live life dreading holidays. I'm my mom's only kid and I'm the only one out of my dad's kids that shows up on holidays. So, my parents will be spending Easter without me and without their granddaughters.
We bicker all the time. Most days I would rather grab my girls and leave than sit in the silence. I feel like I'm screaming on the inside but putting on a happy face. Am I going crazy or am I already there?

Wow! So much has been going on since the last time I was on here. We've had Valentine's Day, my Mom's birthday, Nat's 1st school pictures and everything else in between. The biggest happenings have been Nathaniel NOT getting lay-off and my grandma's hospital stay. Nathaniel was very close to losing his job and by the graces of God he was not part of the 439 people who were laid off. This past Friday my Grandma thought she was having a heart attack while she was babysitting my girls. Thankfully, she was not but she was told to quit smoking or die. So, despite her minor mood swings I think she is doing OK. She misses Nat and Em and wants to see them almost everyday. Starting next week she can have them back again. I'm hoping to work some more hours out at Misty's bakery this spring. I love being there and I want to work for her if she needs me.
Nathaniel and I started marriage counseling this past Monday. Somewhere along the way we have managed to lose our spark. But two kids and working all the time can do that to a marriage. There is a little more to it but I'm not going to go in to it on here. Just wanted to let everyone know and wanted to ask for some prayers.
Here are a BUNCH of pics that I just have to show you!

Emi's Birthday Prty

Today we celebrated Emilee's 2nd Birthday with a small party of family and unexpected friends. The theme was Minnie Mouse and Strawberry Shortcake. Em had lots of fun running around and around with her sister, cousins and friends. When we all sang "Happy Birthday" to her she began to cry...so cute! We want to thank our family who came early to help and stayed late to clean up. Here are some pictures from the party! I especially like the one of my grandma in Minnie Mouse Ears!

Hooray! It's your Birthday Emmy!

Yes, it's true my sweet baby Emmy is officially two years old. I remember the day she was born. I wasn't due until the 19th, but as is her fashion she does everything her way and on her schedule. My Emilee-sweet, cuddly and at times meaner than a snake. She's rough with her not so rough older sister. I predict many nights of screaming and hair pulling between the two, but I also can already see the incredible bond that they have. Emmy always wants to know where her Sissy is and Natalee feels the same. I think it was harder on Emilee when Natalee started going to school this week than it has been for Natalee. Any who...rambling again...Here are some pictures of us four hanging out at the house for Emilee's birthday. We gave Emilee a little stuffed Tigger Toy-she loves him. Natalee tried to take it from her and Emilee said in her high pitched little voice, "No, Mine!" My baby is two-on to potty-training!

Enjoy the pics!Emmy always has her tongue hanging out-my Grandpa Ben use to do that all the time too! Here she is opening her present-she was pretty excited!!

Here she is checking it out and trying to show it to me. When she peeled the wrapping paper back she yelled, "TIGGER!" She was definitely showing him off now. She said, "Mommy, see? Tigger!" ~Sisterly Love~ She is so special to me. What a sweet face.

Emilee and her Daddy-They do kinda complete one another-She follows him everywhere! A bond that can never be broken. Sisters for life-live, laugh, love. She looks so silly in this picture-I think it's my favorite! Don't mind us-just doing as monkeys do-Just hangin' around! I think that this monkey is just a bit too tall for daddy to play this game anymore...Sorry Nat!

Natalee's First Day of Pre-School

It has happened. My darling daughter, Natalee Cara Jean, has started pre-school. I am broken up inside about it. On one hand I am extremely proud of her, but on the other hand she is my first born, my first daughter and I just don't know if I am ready to let her go just yet. She is doing so well in school-I know only day 2 right?! She is able to do things in the classroom that other children can not do. She was able to group items my shape and color today and find the match to that item. *I'm beaming with pride*Natalee is also very proud of herself. I'm trying to let go a little bit, but she is only three years old. I am still aloud to have a little bit of my baby left, right? The biggest surprise from all of this was the following conversation:

\Me: Okay, Nat. I'm going now-love you. I'll be back later to get you.

Natalee: OK c-ya

Me to her teacher: I can't believe she just told me "c-ya"

Teacher: it's OK you'll get use to it-wait til she's 15!

When I came to get her after the longest 2 hours of my life she cried b/c she didn't want to leave her school! At that point I was convinced that she hated me-until later that night she said the sweetest thing to me: "Mommy, I lub you-I miss you muches taday-I have fend ( friend)"

As she was saying this to me her smile was brighter than I have ever seen. Natalee needs a friend-besides me and and her sister.

Here are the two pics that she would hold still for before we left for pre-school.

The 1st pic she is showing off her back pack. The second pic is her best effort at a rushed smile.